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The Safe and Sound Protocol for neurodivergent families

The Safe and Sound Protocol – SSP for neurodivergent families: Why Move2Connect offers a family package

The Safe and Sound Protocol for neurodivergent families

You have probably found this blog post because you’re researching the SSP (Safe and Sound Protocol) for your child.

The Safe and Sound Protocol (in its standard format) is a five-hour listening therapy, which works directly with the autonomic nervous system to make the a person feel safe in the world by tuning up their autonomic function, which in turn improves social engagement. It does this by passively stimulating the vagus nerve by means of specially filtered music. It is the only auditory programme to work directly with the autonomic nervous system, and is now used widely by all sorts of healthcare and mental health professionals with a variety of conditions caused by mis-firing autonomic nervous systems.

The Safe and Sound Protocol was first launched as a way to help autistic children improve social engagement. It has been acknowledged since that the reason this is so effective is because it’s working with the trauma inherent in autism – in other words, the stress caused by being forced to function in an environment that is not accepting of autism.

For context, I have been working with the SSP pretty much since it was first available in the UK, and have probably worked with more clients than anyone else here – with a myriad of presentations and a beautiful rainbow of different nervous systems.

The Safe and Sound Protocol for neurodivergent families

The Safe and Sound Protocol used to be provided by means of an MP3 player, which I would use in-clinic. I would also sometimes rent these MP3 players out to clients once they had been through a rigorous screening session in clinic. There were huge challenges in using physical equipment, in that either clients had to attend scheduled sessions, OR schedule a rental period. Most of the time, this worked well, but occasionally, more sensitive clients needed more time or needed to miss scheduled sessions. This made providing the SSP – and using the SSP as a client – costly and a logistical nightmare.

However, from March 2020, SSP providers had to adopt a different way of working due to lockdowns and our lack of understanding of COVID19 at the time.

The licensing organisation, Unyte, released a digital version of the SSP via an app. This enabled discussion on the safest way to work with clients remotely with the SSP.

It is important to recognise that the Safe and Sound Protocol in itself is not a therapy – it is a TOOL used by therapists, and we all do it slightly differently. Some hand-hold, some budget providers only give access to the tool and let their clients get on with it – not really advisable, but it happens – caveat emptor.

My opinion, having run a clinic for neurodivergent children and adults for the last 8 years, is that it is important to engage with the Safe and Sound Protocol (and my other work) in an environment that feels safe. For most people, home is a safe space – so this makes engaging with the SSP in the comfort of your own home appealing, convenient and most effective.

Even more effective is ensuring that a child’s needs during the SSP are fully met – and the best way to do this is for a parent to go through the process themselves first.

My approach is to train parents first. They then go through the Safe and Sound Protocol themselves, and learn to understand their bodies’ cues and their own nervous systems. After that, they take their own children through the SSP, as those who understand their children better than anyone else, as well as through the eyes of someone who has completed the Safe and Sound Protocol in their own way.

When I first started working with primitive reflexes with my own child, over a decade ago, I remember our therapist telling me that parents of children with retained reflexes always benefit from going through the process themselves too. At first, I thought this was a potential money-spinner and ignored the advice. However, the more I read about primitive reflexes and the more fascinated I became, the more I realised that it was something I needed to experience – if only to understand the changes we were seeing on a daily basis in my child.

I decided to take that time out for myself – I went along, was fully assessed and did exercises daily in order to experience what my child experienced. And I changed – enormously – for the better. The experience dramatically improved my social anxiety, as well as my ability to connect so much better with my child, which is completely key to seeing positive results. A prescriptive “working on” approach when working with neuroplasticity therapies is not as effective as a “working with” approach.

The same happened when I trained in the SSP. Of course, I used it on myself before using with my children. And of course, I had the same excitement and impatience as my clients often have when they first approach me! At first, all I noticed was calm and spontaneous joy – and later came the realisation that my connection with my children, patience and ability to co-regulate effectively had all improved so dramatically that my children had CHANGED – without my children even going through the SSP themselves.

By the time it was their turn, the outcome was so noticeable that I remember being stopped at school pick-up time by the teacher, who wanted to know what we had done as there was such a marked change in my child’s focus and attention.

For example, if a parent’s motive for using the SSP is to “fix” their child, it’s unlikely they’ll notice as much of a benefit as if they work with themselves first and then with their child. When children have undesirable “reactions” to the Safe and Sound Protocol, it is because a child’s primitive brain is feeling under attack – the SSP can make this more sensitive.

Working with the Safe and Sound Protocol is like buying a beautiful piece of well-loved antique furniture – a table, for example, complete with blobs of paint and scratches, applying paint stripper and giving it a good rub down:

If you then nurture and look after that piece of furniture, perhaps applying a coat of varnish or wax and protecting it with coasters when you put a mug of tea down on it, it will gleam in it’s new setting (equating to co-regulation and providing cues of safety). If you, however, don’t look after it and stick hot mugs of tea down, or allow the children to draw on it with sharp, scratchy pencils, it’s going to quickly return to the way it was before you did all that work.

I specialise in working with the Safe and Sound Protocol with neurodivergent families. For this reason, my pricing includes a parent and child and full coaching in polyvagal theory and how to use the Safe and Sound Protocol for YOUR FAMILY. This looks completely different for each family. For example, the SSP for PDA involves ensuring that a child understands that this is going to work for them on THEIR terms – not mine. Another good reason for parents to go first!

If you would like to understand how the SSP could work for your family, please book a discovery call.

Neuroplasticity retained reflexes retained reflexes Special Needs Education Uncategorized

DIY Primitive Reflex Exercises

I’ve always warned against DIY primitive reflex exercises without the careful guidance of a practitioner.

However, realistically speaking, not everyone has the budget to commit long-term to a programme with a practitioner, some people live a long way from a practitioner, and people will always look for ways to try to do this work for themselves – I know I would have been the same.

I am now happy to endorse an alternative that’s second-best to coming to see a therapist in person. I do stress that this is second best, as it’s a programme that will not address the earliest piece of the development puzzle in the same way that the Safe and Sound Protocol and RMTi do.

It’s a self-managed listening programme consisting of 20 hours of music coupled with a movement programme, devised by Tomatis, called Soundsory. Soundsory uses bone conduction headphones coupled with an ecclectic rhythmic collection of music and a movement programme, which is available via a login allocated when you sign up.

Soundsory

Soundsory can help with sensory, emotional, motor coordination and learning challenges by primarily targetting the vestibular system. However, if a person would be unable to copy or replicate the movements, it may be necessary to modify the programme to incorporate passive movements, with input by me.

I would still always recommend the Safe and Sound Protocol as a pre-cursor to Soundsory, but this is a great do-it-yourself, home-based programme for those who either do not have time to come into clinic or do not have the funds to complete a bespoke reflex integration programme.

What I like about this programme is that it’s yours to own for a one-off cost, and requires no practitioner input or monthly subscriptions. If you get on well with this, you could later consider signing up for one of the longer term programmes, but then again, you might want to repeat Soundsory.

Buy Soundsory

DIY Primitive Reflex Exercises It’s a self-managed listening programme consisting of 20 hours of music coupled with a movement programme, devised by Tomatis, called Soundsory. Soundsory uses bone conduction headphones coupled with an ecclectic rhythmic collection of music and a movement programme, which is available via a login allocated when you sign up.

FPR: Fear Paralysis Reflex Moro reflex Neuroplasticity retained reflexes retained reflexes Spinal Galant Reflex Uncategorized

Co-Regulation and Whole Brain Approach in Primitive Reflex Integration

In the years I’ve been working with neuroplasticity and primitive reflex integration, I’ve lost count of the number of parents who want to know the % their child’s reflexes are retained, as well as EXACTLY which reflexes are retained.

Primitive reflex integration

It is really important to know that we are not JUST looking at an exact percentage! We’re looking at the full picture. In fact, I do not even NEED to test a child’s (or their parent’s) reflexes in order to start working with them – I can see what I need to do by the time they’ve sat down in the room. The reflex tests are really only for the benefit of watching progress – but we also do that by watching behaviour, emotions and cognition from the time a child heads off with a new set of movements to work with.

Additionally, it’s important to understand that if we do not see a reflex reaction when we test, it doesn’t mean it’s not there: we also look at whether a body is compensating and trying to hide the presence of a reflex (very common in children with a strong fear paralysis reflex). It’s also possible that a reflex has not even emerged yet, which is why I rarely test for a huge range of reflexes initially.

Also, while a programme of movements is important, it is useful for parents to know that by co-regulating with and working WITH your child, you’ll almost certainly see the best results. If you push your child through a programme of movements that are impossible for them to grasp, all you’ll do is stress yourself and your child.

A few years back, I was contacted by someone who was concerned their child wasn’t making progress with another practitioner. After doing some delving, I discovered that this parent was putting their child through around half an hour of movements every single day. Rather than progressing, this child had “regressed” significantly – massive meltdowns and zoning out at school – due to the parent working ON rather than WITH.

Obviously, we all want quick fixes, but neuroplasticity is NEVER a quick fix, and it really isn’t something you can force on someone without attuning to their nervous system.

I love it when parents are fascinated by my work and want to give it a go too. By jumping onto my mat and experiencing passive movements for themselves, they are learning how it feels, which in turn helps them to deliver those movements more effectively for their child – asking for feedback while working with.

There are some children who simply cannot go through a primitive reflex assessment. That is fine! As I mentioned above, I do not need to test reflexes to know what we need to do. Very often, I have my gym ball with me. This is a great piece of equipment because children instinctively know how to use it to integrate their own reflexes. Sometimes they’ll sit on it and bounce, and other times they’ll use it to propell themselves around. This gives me a lot more information than merely getting a child to go through reflex tests: it gives me important information on how to calm their nervous systems.

My 55cm gym ball – the most popular activity in my clinic!

The point of me writing this post is that in order to make the very best progress, the following factors need to be in place:

Parents need to invest in the process
This is about working WITH your child, not ON them – co-regulation is at the heart of safety
Do not fixate on reflexes – this is a whole brain/body approach, and your connection with your child is fundamental for their progress
Allow your child to lead you – watch for signs of them trying to integrate their own reflexes.
Consistency is key. You cannot stop/start or only contact your therapist when it suits you – you need to make a commitment to do movements 5-7 times a week with your child and visit your therapist every 4-6 weeks on average

To find your nearest neurodevelopmental therapist, you can use this directory

Book your initial appointment here!

retained reflexes

What are retained reflexes?

I wrote this blog post as a result of some of the media reports I’ve seen, following Chris Evans’ enthusiasm about how reflex integration, “a miracle treatment”, helped his son with his reading, writing, attention and anxiety.

The way these reports have been worded in the tabloid newspapers demonstrates a lack of understanding of the subject matter and may convey the wrong message to readers. For this reason, I wanted to dispel a few myths, explain what retained reflexes really mean and who reflex integration can help.

So, what are retained reflexes?

Since Chris mentioned “retained reflexes”, those of us working in this field have taken on hundreds of new clients.

Primitive reflex integration - What Are Retained Reflexes — The order in which primitive reflexes emerge, mature and integrate

One of the things I keep hearing is “my child has been DIAGNOSED with retained reflexes”. “Retained reflexes” is NOT a condition, and it’s not a “diagnosis”: either you have active primitive reflexes/lack adult postural reflexes or you don’t! (And actually, most people DO!)

Journalists for our tabloid press described Chris Evans’ son as “having a condition”, even a “syndrome” at one point – I was so incensed by this inaccurate description that I contacted a press agency that supplies to the tabloids myself to try to explain, but the journalist I spoke to didn’t really understand what I was explaining – probably due to her own retained reflexes, ironically!

The above is one of the better-written articles – still laden with inaccuracies. (Also, what the flamingo is “joint-up writing”?)

So what is a primitive reflex?

Primitive reflexes are the reflexive, uncontrolled movements that a foetus and newborn baby makes. The most well known of these is the moro reflex, which is what fills a baby’s lungs with air when they take their first breath.

If our primitive reflexes do not disappear at the appropriate time (within the first year, as our developmental milestones emerge and we learn to control our bodies consciously), we “retain” these primitive reflexes, which leads to poor postural control and emotional and learning challenges.

As for whether reflex integration is a “miracle treatment”, I would argue that it isn’t a “miracle”. It is indeed wonderful to see people transform before your eyes, especially when it’s your own family – or indeed to feel the change yourself as I have. However, when you begin to understand how the brain and central nervous system work, the fact that we can give the system a second chance to develop appropriately makes so much sense that it’s not a miracle – it’s just exciting to witness.

Could you have retained reflexes?

You might be reading this post because you are worried about your child… but what I want you to understand, as you are an avid researcher of these matters, is that pretty much ALL of us have a few retained primitive reflexes. Do you, for example, get seasick? fear heights? jump out of your skin at unexpected loud bangs, and then have an adrenaline rush? find social situations difficult? find that you can’t pay attention in a lecture without fiddling/doodling? find it hard to sit still for long periods of time, slouch or wrap your legs around your chair? Do you jerk yourself awake, thinking you’re falling off a cliff?

This is what the Moro reflex looks like in a newborn

ALL of the above are signs that you may have retained primitive reflexes. And yet, do you have a diagnosis? You may have, or perhaps not. Some people sail through life with the odd retained reflex – but have they REALLY sailed through life? Possibly not.

In fact, around a third of my clients are parents, who have started seeing me via their children.

Brief intro to retained reflexes

Example of retained reflexes as a result of trauma

As someone who has been through the reflex integration thing myself, I have a strange story to tell:

I used to commute to Canary Wharf every day from Winchester. The commute involved enormous descents on escalators, and yet this didn’t ever bother me.

After my first child was born, I suddenly developed an irrational fear of escalators. I could not ever step on one. In fact, a couple of years ago, I was in tears watching my family head happily down an escalator at Waterloo station while I stood there, frozen to the spot. I had to walk miles to find stairs to take me to the same platform. Fortunately, I no longer commute into London, so it’s not a huge problem really, and actually, walking IS better really… but it can be inconvenient to be separated from the family because of an irrational phobia.

So, why did I suddenly fear escalators? Well, my firstborn had an extremely horrible birth: he was induced with a drip. My active labour was about half an hour before I needed to push, but the poor little guy got stuck. After two hours of pushing, he was delivered by ventouse in theatre, with me totally powerless due to a spinal block. While I was training in reflex integration, I processed this trauma by going into extreme fear paralysis (dorsal vagal/freeze) for a while, which was extremely unpleasant.The Safe and Sound Protocol has helped me to feel safe to the extent that I no longer feel like crying when I pass the Royal Surrey County Hospital.

Going back to my fear of escalators, the lasting effect of being pulled and manipulated and pushing as hard as I could in theatre under a spinal block (zero sensation) is that my Tonic Labyrinthine Reflex (TLR) appears to have re-emerged at that time, which gave me a fear that I might tumble forwards down a steep escalator.

Using my own programme every day, I’ve managed to help my TLR to integrate. I generally feel a lot more stable, have zero shoulder pain these days – and the best part is that I managed to descend on an escalator at Gatwick airport the other day – what a wonderful surprise!

Diagnoses vs Primitive Reflexes

Equally, if you or your child has a diagnosis, please understand that a diagnosis is a checklist of a set of symptoms/presentations/behaviours. If you work with reflex integration, you may get rid of those behaviours, but the diagnosis will still be in place unless you go back to a doctor and ask to be re-assessed. I know of people who have done this – it’s well worth having an accurate medical record… but just don’t expect a doctor to know what “retained reflexes” are, because you’ll just get a look – been there, done that, got the retained reflexes t-shirt.

Our reflexes make us who we are. If you have irrational fears or find it hard to stick to plans, that will be your reflexes telling your brain to give you irrational fears or change your plans – you don’t need a diagnosis to explain that behaviour away. However, to change habits of a lifetime that are causing you issues and stopping you from enjoying your time on this planet, you can remove these challenges completely through reflex integration.